Thursday, April 13, 2006

Tonight Bobby is at his meeting or should I say a "non meeting". The 12 step program is just like a cult. They program you to think that the meetings are the most important thing in the world... more important than your family... your job.... your education... even yourself. They prey on young people that come in that might have just been experimenting with drinking or drugs like a lot of teenagers... but the ones in the rooms that get sucked in will be programmed to believe that for the rest of their lives they need the rooms to keep them clean and sober, while they meanwhile hang around people that might not be so "clean". The rooms are like a perpetual high school where the participants never grow up... the only ones that have a chance are the ones that get away and don't use... but lead normal lives away from the rooms and realize how sick the behavior in the rooms were. To have to say "My name is Bobby and I'm an addict" for every single meeting, like you'd ever forget. Is like loosing weight but still saying everyday... "Hi My name is Felice and I'm Fat" every single day of your life, even when your thin. A constant reminder of what you once were... never being allowed to move on with your life and close that one chapter.... always being reminded, especially when your around people that are stuck in the same mode that you are... being told not to pursue anything that might interrupt their recovery. Imagine being encouraged not to go to school because it will be too stressful and might hurt your recovery. Ok I've said enough for today...


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